Is it time to make the call?

…take action or let it go…

Thinking, thinking and more thinking inevitably leads to one thing: overthinking!

I feel you. I've been dilly dallying around, adapting to being in lockdown again and staying motivated. It's hard. There's one thing I know for sure that always helps me stay motivated...ACTION. Even if it's the smallest of steps, it always provides that oomph I need to keep moving forward.  

Happy 2022!

New Year. Fresh start. Things have changed. Have you checked in with yourself lately? How about those things that have been occupying your mind?  Maybe now's a good time to take a look?

So here's the question: How long have you been thinking about it? Doesn't really matter what "it" is, you can only think about something for so long.

Do you have a decision to make?

I’m not referring to things that may require a lot of thought. I’m referring to the thing that continues to niggle at you; maybe it wakes you up, or stops you from falling asleep. Somehow, it always seems to make it to your "list" but never seems to get any attention. Those things. It's just a little thing and yet it continues to take up a lot of bandwidth. That thing that you think you really want to do or have, that thing that you just can't seem to get around to. 

It doesn’t really matter what it’s about … you can do something, or put it to bed. Take some sort of action. 

Let's get to it...

Are you willing to try this out?

Your challenge for the next week...

Think about that one thing.  If there's more than one thing, just pick the one that pops into your mind now (you can always do this process with the other thing(s) later).

Ask yourself, is this really something that I want to do or have?   Notice what comes up. Then make the call.

• Hell yes - this is usually a visceral response. Plan the first baby step you will take...now!

• Yes, but not now - maybe you do recognize that you definitely want to do that thing but now isn't the right time. Identify when the right time will be and commit to it.

• No, Never - sometimes all it takes is a moment of really checking in on something to realize that you actually don't want it at all. It may be one of those things that someone else wanted for you and it kept making it to your list. Let it go.

Regardless of what came up for you, it's all a form of action.  Making a decision to say yes to your thing; prioritize it for later or to let it go is taking action.

After making the decision - notice how you feel - many times there's a lightness, a shift in energy. 

It's the start of a New Year! Want to prioritize so you can put your energy where it matters?  Contact me Maybe starting fresh in 2022 is a good idea?

Stay safe and well.

Cheers,

Ann

Before you slam the door on 2021...

Does anyone else feel like 2020 and 2021 just morphed into one year?  Are you having trouble tracking when certain events occurred?  My guess is you're not alone!

 It's almost New Year's Eve and the countdown is on... what if you took a few moments to reflect?

Here we are, perched at the beginning of a New Year, with yet again, so much uncertainty.  I continue to be hopeful, sometimes tired of all of this and, hopeful. 

I typically love this time of year. It's a chance to reflect: Say goodbye to some things that are no longer useful. Recognize things to hang on to and, it offers the opportunity to welcome new possibilities. 

Despite the uncertainty, this still remains true for me. How about you?

I'm not one for making resolutions, I've always preferred taking some time to reflect on the year that was.

How about you? Do you have a special way to mark the end of the year? Do you have a ritual for planning the next year? 

New beginnings, cleaning the slate, starting over...just a few of the ways some people refer to a New Year. While cleaning the slate and starting fresh may sound appealing, especially in these times, there may be a few things you want to hang on to. 

I'd like to offer this quick practice that I've been doing for the last several years; it doesn't take a lot of time and, you may be surprised by what pops up for you. The key here is to let what bubbles up be the answer, no second guessing... trust your brain! Then get curious after.

Let's get to it...

Are you willing to try this out? You're definitely going to want to grab a piece of paper and something to write with...and maybe a timer if you want...
 

Your challenge for the next couple of days? Take some time to explore these questions:

What am I ready to leave behind?

What better time than the end of a year to ask yourself this question? We carry so many things with us year over year, maybe it's time to leave behind the things that are keeping you stuck, or holding you back. Perhaps its a relationship you've outgrown, a habit or feeling that you are done with, an attitude or even a tangible "thing"? Just notice what comes to mind for you.

What do I want to keep?

While setting new goals is always exciting, it's important to remember some of the stuff that you already have that's pretty great. Stuff you may want to keep. Relationships, health, friendships, work, useful practices that you do etc. Or maybe something new that you started out of necessity this year that you want to carry forward? A different way of working perhaps, a new relationship or a new habit that you started in 2021 that has been useful for you.

What do I want to add or have more of in 2022?

While "adding" always sounds good, you may already have some things in your life that you just want more of - family and friend time, me time or you get the idea here. Maybe you want to start a new thing? Perhaps it's about having more choices in a current situation. Whatever surfaces for you, take note.

What have I put on hold that I am now ready to look at?

As another year of restrictions comes to an end, perhaps you're ready to dust something off that you've put aside? One thing that has become even more clear this year is: there is no perfect time to do that thing you want to do. Even in a holding pattern, there is movement...sometimes slight, but movement nevertheless.

...and maybe most useful?

What have I discovered about myself this year?

2021 has continued to provide us with multiple opportunities to learn and adapt. Maybe, after another year, you've taken up a new hobby that surprised you or, you reawakened a previous passion? What practices have you adopted to ensure that you are staying well?  Spend some time pondering "what did I discover about myself?". Amidst all of the upheaval and persistent changes, what have you discovered about you?

I'm always intrigued by what comes up by running through this process. It creates food for thought .. which, is the point by the way....to get you thinking. No matter what surfaces for you I do hope that it's useful.


If you discover that you're ready to re-look at that thing you've put on hold  Contact me  I'd love to help you get what you want in 2022!

Happy New Year! Wishing you continued health, mind, body and spirit.

Cheers,

Ann

Is it a dead end?

Look closer...

You've been pursuing that thing you want and all of a sudden, you feel like you've come to a dead end. You can't see the finish line and it looks like it's over.

Look again...

No goal worth pursuing is going to follow a linear path. If you can see from start to finish right out of the gate, then maybe, it's not a goal. Maybe it's more of a "tick box" on your check list. Read that again.
 

Think about it.  What makes a goal, a goal? I know the SMART (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Realistic and Timely) philosophy and I'm guessing that most of you reading this are aware of this terminology.  This makes good sense for a business goal for sure. 

What about those "other" goals you have?  Dare I say the more important ones? The ones for you personally.  

Any goal has to have enough tension in it to make it worthwhile. A stretch. Something more than a check list activity.  Because when you achieve a goal it's not so much the trophy or certificate or whatever it is that symbolizes success. Rather, it's the path that led you there. A path that was probably littered with potholes, gravel and hills...life. The story of the path. That's what we remember when we achieve something and that's usually what we share with others when we describe our success. The trials and tribulations that led to the end result.

So let me ask you again - what if it's not a dead end? What if, it's a redirection, a detour of sorts?
 

The road may be closed but the gravel path is wide open...  
 

Let's get to it...

Are you willing to try this out?

Your challenge for the next week...

Take a moment now to remember a time you achieved a goal. Allow a memory to come up for you. Get immersed in the memory as if it's happening now.  This is not a random memory, my guess is that it may be useful for the situation you are working on now.  Ask yourself, what can I tap into from this experience that will be useful for this goal I am working on now?  Allow the answer to bubble up.

Now think about that thing you want. Have you really come to a dead end, or is there an off road detour to take?

It's the end of the year and my schedule is full, but feel free to  Contact me  I'm thinking that starting fresh in 2022 may be a good idea?

Stay safe and well.

Cheers,

Ann

What if it did work out?

Is it time to re-think it?

What have you written off because...

You've been thinking about that thing for a while now and still haven't done anything about it. You're not alone. Our brain's default is to look for trouble…it's built that way. It's not unusual at all to become doubtful or probably more accurately, fearful, when we're looking at doing something new. It's that "fight or flight" overreaction that our reptilian brains do anytime we entertain doing something different. Even if it is for positive reasons. The fact that we are going to expend energy that will occupy our brain and distract it from keeping us safe, is enough to send it into a tailspin...hence the doubt, fear, and ultimately, INACTION.  

Not very practical at all...

We allow that voice in our head to give us all the reasons why it can't happen. Check in. Is it even your voice? There can be a whole choir in there that doesn't even belong to you.

I'm thinking, if you're going to spend energy worrying about all the things that could go wrong, you may as well use that energy to contemplate what could go right. What if, instead of looking for the problem, you imagine the possibilities?

What if it did work out?
 

It's easier to tell ourselves that it wouldn't work out anyway.  It feels safer and can calm you down. Except...except it's bullshit.  You didn't come here to settle, did you?


Take a moment now to think of a time in your life when you did something new despite what that voice in your head was saying. Maybe it's a time long ago, you know, when you were a kid or a teenager perhaps?  Why?  Because back then we often acted before we thought too much about something.  Not necessarily a good practice then, however I'm thinking it's probably something really useful to tap into now? When you look back now, at that lived experience, what do you notice about how you felt? A sense of pride perhaps or a "no regrets" feeling?  Whatever it is, what if you bring that feeling to this current situation you are putting off?  What changes when you do that?

Telling ourselves something won't work out keeps us small and safe and gets us off the hook from being the fullest, most badass version of ourselves.  That doesn't sound at all how I want to live my life.  How about you? Is hanging out in the safe zone where you want to be? I didn't think so.

Let's get to it...

Are you willing to try this out?

Your challenge for the next week...

Whatever it is that you've been putting off,  ask yourself the question: What if it did work out? 

Maybe make a list, to counteract the list you already have (even if it's only in your head) for why it won't work out.  Be courageous and bold and see what shows up for you. Sometimes seeing something in print can make the difference you need to take the first step.
 

It's the end of the year and my schedule is full, but feel free to  Contact me   I'm thinking that starting fresh in 2022 may be a good idea?

Stay safe and well.

Cheers,

Ann

What are you ready for?

Notice that I didn't ask you "are you ready" for something. Asking the question this way gives you an out. Something to say no to.  An opportunity to say I'm not ready yet. Or, I'm ready except; or I'll be ready when...or I just need more time...you get the picture. 

The truth of the matter may be that, when you're embarking on something that's going to change things in your life, (even if it's for good reasons), you may never feel ready.  I'm thinking this is pretty normal. The status quo is so comfortable, even if it isn't exactly what we want, it's far more comfortable than doing something new. This is precisely why we can come up with a multitude of reasons to explain why now is not a good time to do something.  It can feel scary and risky.  Those are real feelings and our brain would prefer it if we kept doing what we always do. It takes way less energy to keep on doing what we're doing and makes it easier for our brain to continue to keep us safe. Sound like a sweet deal?  I didn't think so...

So I'll ask you again "What are you ready for?

Now notice the first thing that comes up for you. Take a moment and let it bubble up. 

Was it a surprise? Or is it something you've been thinking about for a while that you've been tucking away until? It could be as simple as your next cup of coffee, or maybe, you're ready to contemplate your next career move. 

Whatever came up is the right thing. 

I want you to check in with yourself and notice: What tells you that you're "ready" for that thing that came up for you?  When I say check in, I want you to close your eyes and think about that thing you are ready for.  As you do, notice any sensations that may come up for you, in particular, any physical sensations.  I know that when I'm feeling "ready" I get a strong sensation in my chest, almost a leaning forward, as if I'm starting a race. How about you?  Take a moment now to really notice because, whether you are ready for a cup of coffee, or to sign on the dotted line, chances are that "readiness" will show up the same way. Cool? Right?


One more thought: It's December, I know…how did that happen?  Are you ready to do this thing before 2021 comes to a close?

 Maybe now is the time.

Let's get to it...

Are you willing to try this out?

Your challenge for the next week...

Check in with what bubbled up for you when you asked yourself the question. Then consider:

• What's one step to get the ball rolling?

  • make the call;

  • send the text;

  • or perhaps, just write the list.

It doesn't have to be big to get started, in fact, smaller is more likely to be sustainable. Take the first step and let the next one follow.

If you're feeling ready and you don't know where to start  Contact me  for a chat, it's always good to hear from you!

Stay safe and well.

Cheers,

Ann

Are you looking for the halo or the horns?

Then you will find them…

Are you looking for the halo or the horns? 

I can vividly recall being in elementary school, probably grade seven or so, Gerry** was that kid. The bad one.  As I reflect I am guessing that Gerry had one hell of a childhood.  At school? Gerry was the bad kid.  Instigating fights at recess, talking back in class, storming out of the library...when there was something "bad" going on, you would usually find Gerry at the centre of it. 

Everyone - students, teachers, other parents, expected the bad behaviour and Gerry delivered. People looked for the horns and that's what they got. Except that one teacher, Mr. Smith**.  My guess is that Mr. Smith was probably in his early 20's at the time, as most new teachers are, and he was different.  He spoke to Gerry in a different way and Gerry responded differently to him as well.  No surprise that when Gerry was in Mr. Smith's class he was able to, albeit briefly, be a reasonably "good kid". Basically, he stayed out of trouble and did his work. That was what was expected of him in this class and he delivered. Mr. Smith could see Gerry's potential.

Where am I going with this? The concept of "halo or horns" comes up constantly, whether we are aware of it or not.

We are in the home stretch of 2021 and, in many organizations right now it's that time of year...performance reviews. I thought I would give you some food for thought. How we choose to look at someone is often how they will show up for us. 

At work? It can be how a boss sees an employee. This is a classic one. You will find whatever you are looking for. It's a form of confirmation bias. When you have an employee you see as a super star, you will find evidence to support it and, may even overlook undesirable behaviour because of this halo bias. Conversely and possibly more detrimental, is the horns bias, like Gerry experienced all those years ago, where  good attributes were overlooked.

Once you decide that someone is not doing what they should do or underdelivering,  the tendency can be to amplify all of the things they aren't doing to your satisfaction and find all kinds of evidence to support the horns you have put on them. Scary, right? It's yet another way to bring awareness to the fact that, what we focus on shows up. And, we have choices when it comes to directing our attention.

This obviously doesn't just show up at work. It can show up pretty much anywhere. We put a label on someone and look for evidence to support it.  Whether you're looking for the halo or the horns you will find them. You will become blinded by the bias you have unwittingly created. This blind spot will prevent you from seeing the full picture.

Have you put someone in a category and become blind to their other attributes?  Good or bad. Maybe check in and see?

Everyone wears horns every now and then, it's human. Think about it. Where might balancing out this truth be useful?

Let's get to it...

Are you willing to try this out?

Your challenge for the next week...

What if you think about a particular situation or maybe a person who is causing you some difficulty and ask yourself,  "am I looking for the halo or the horns"? You may be surprised by what you discover. Maybe try looking for the good and see what happens.


If you're preparing for a performance review or any other situation where preparation would be useful  Contact me Preparing clients for conversations where "showing up as your best matters", happens to be one of the things I specialize in and I'm really good at it!

Stay safe and well.

Warmly,

Ann

**real names have been changed

Still thinking about "it"?

It's definitely a start...and it won't get it done.

I've been thinking a lot recently about making cookies...Granny Cookies... to be specific.  They are a special cookie that my Mum made that became a favourite of the grandchildren...hence, the name.  So apparently I was talking about them again when my son,  Austin, turned to me and said, thinking about it won't get it done Mom. 

Kind of obvious isn't it?

Maybe there's something you keep thinking about doing that isn't getting done?  It could be a bit more important to you than making cookies and nonetheless, you're not getting it done.

Don't get me wrong, thinking is a good thing and I'm guessing that a lot of busy people probably don't take enough time to do it. Saying yes rather than pausing and thinking might have resulted in yet another thing making it to your "to-do" list.  Perhaps this is why we can end up doing things that we didn't really sign up for.

Then there's overthinking.  Running over something again and again and never quite making a decision.  

But that's not you, right?  You think just the right amount and only say yes to what you mean to say yes to...

For the rest of you?

Are you ready to stop thinking and make a decision?

Let's get to it...

Are you willing to try this out?

Your challenge for the next week...

Check in on the thing you've been thinking about and meaning to get done.

Maybe ask yourself:

• Do I actually want to do this thing I am thinking about?

  • If the answer is no?

  • How did this make it to my list?

  • Does this really have to get done?

  • If so, does this have to get done by ME?

  • If not? DON'T spend anymore time thinking about it. Let it go

• If the answer is yes?

  • What's stopping me from doing it?

  • Are you're looking at the entire thing and getting overwhelmed?

  • Have you been putting it at the bottom of your list because it's not important enough?

  • Or maybe, you just don't know where to start?

For me? The answer is yes. Yes, I do want to make the cookies.
How do I start? The first little step I need to take? Grab the recipe. That's step one.

That's how you move from thinking to action. Figure out the first little step. Then the next...trusting that tiny steps, taken consistently over time, WILL result in transformational change or, in this specific example... a great batch of cookies!

If you're ready to stop thinking and make a decision,  Contact me for a chat. It's always good to hear from you!

Stay safe and well.

Warmly,

Ann

Is it time for a wake up call?

What if you got to choose?

A wake up call, by nature, is typically something that "happens to us". It's a call to action, often the result of an aha moment. That moment when someone says something that lands in a way that instantly changes how we think about something. An epiphany.

Or, it could be the result of an oh shit moment, a moment that blindsides you and leaves you wondering “what am I going to do now”?

And, it could be that moment when you decide that enough is enough. I’m done….with whatever it is…the job, the relationship, your physical state, way of thinking etc.

A wake up call, by nature, tends to be a whoosh…and all of a sudden, things will never be the same. It's that kind of experience, a moment that can knock the wind out of you and leave you breathless. It can also be the moment that propels you to the next amazing chapter in your life. It's a call to action, when taking action might be the last thing on your mind. That's why it is a wake up call!

Wouldn't you rather choose?

We are creeping towards the middle of November. I know…sorry about that. Has another year gone by where you're wondering where the time went? You really meant to do this or to stop that, but then….the world has kind of been keeping you in a holding pattern.

Sometimes a wake up call gives you no other option than to make a decision, start something new, or maybe stop to reflect and get a fresh perspective. Now what? That can be what happens too. Now what? Rather than being caught like a deer in the headlights, what if you actually had a plan?

The "new normal" is starting to unfold, bit by bit.  This is an invitation to start considering what your options may be moving forward.  Maybe it's no longer necessary to hang on to the safe stuff until the storm passes.  

What if you consider this message an invitation to a call to action...without all the drama of a wake up call?  How would New Year’s Eve be different this year as you reflect on that thing you ended up taking action on because you decided it was time?

When the count down to 2022 is on, how do you want to be feeling?  Do you want to feel like you're starting off on the right foot, that you're taking your situation under your control?  That you DO have options? 

It's possible to start planning to be where you want to be in 2022. To be setting yourself up for a fulfilling and successful year.  There are so many possibilities for you!  

What if you make 2022 the year that you decided to take a step towards what you want, rather than putting things on hold until the whoosh of a wake up call knocks you off your feet? 

Let's get to it...

Are you willing to try this out?

Your challenge for the next week...

Check in with yourself. Take some time to mull over these questions and suggestions (you can even answer them on a piece of paper).

• Ask yourself: Where is there one place in my life where I'm ready to make a change? Let it come up and trust the answer.

• What would it feel like to make this change?

• How will this affect how I show up for myself and others?

• Baby steps.

• Literally, make one tiny change. Try it on and decide - is this what I want? If so...make one more tiny change and continue to ask the question. Is this what I want?

• If not? You've only made one tiny step, so it's easy to step back, right? Then you can decide to take another tiny step in a different direction. Always checking in, always asking the question - is this what I want?

Trusting that tiny steps, taken consistently over time,WILLresult in transformational change.Promise.

If you're ready to take action,  Contact me for a chat. It's always good to hear from you!

Stay safe and well.

Warmly,

Ann

Whose race are you running?

…stay in your own lane…

With the "great resignation" upon us, I thought I'd share a story with you...

Back a few years now, (almost eight!) I took a step that would forever change the trajectory of my life - I hired a coach.  Little did I know what was in store for me and how my entire definition of the race I was running would come to a screeching halt. Yes. It was that powerful.

I was at a crossroads in my work life …all of the boxes that suggested "success" were ticked:

• great job

• fantastic salary

• a team I loved working with

• a boss who challenged me

• and, of course, all of the "things" that went with it...

But it was no longer satisfying me. Maybe you can relate?

Then...

Then I did a writing exercise that changed my life. My coach asked me to write about what "success" meant to me.  So I did.

When I shared it with her I still hadn't "seen" the aha.  Probably because it wasn't what I had written that mattered so much as what didn't make it to the list: All the check box things didn't make it to the list, not even one of them! Things. All of that had some how got missed. Mic drop.  I was sort of blown away.  When I actually took the time to reflect - all of the other "things" that bubbled up weren't "things" at all.  It went far deeper than that. 

I knew then that I had to figure out what race I was actually supposed to be in because, somewhere along the way, I clearly ended up in a lane that was not mine. I had gone into autopilot, I had stepped out of my lane. Rather than looking around, I was going along with what I thought I was supposed to be doing/having/being - thinking that "this was the way it was" and that there was nothing else I could do to be both successful and fulfilled. Not true.

How about you? 

Why am I sharing this with you now? As I mentioned above, apparently, the "great resignation" is upon us. Not that I am suggesting that you jump ship but, I'm guessing that perhaps more than one or two of you have been mulling over your next steps?

Perhaps its time to check inon your race? Are you in your lane or have you veered off course?

When's the last time you checked in with yourself and asked -am I running my own race? Notice what comes up for you when you ask yourself this question. You may find that what you're doing fits the bill - awesome -you're in your lane, running your race.

If not...

Let's get to it...

Are you willing to try this out?

Your challenge for the next week...

Check in with yourself.

• Ask yourself: "am I running my own race"? Whatever that means for you. It may or may not be work related.

• Perhaps pick one small area of your life and focus there. Let it come up organically...trust what pops for you.

• I highly recommend putting an actual pen to paper to explore this.

• When you're done, ask yourself: What's one small thing I can do right now to get closer to my own lane. Then repeat, often.

If you're ready to run your own race,  Contact me for a chat. It's always good to hear from you!

Stay safe and well.

Warmly,

Ann

What are you ready to get back to?

Is it just me, or did Fall suddenly just happen?!  It seems to have crept up and then landed...hard.

I usually feel inclined to refresh in September yet it felt so "summery" that I kept doing what I was doing. Now?  It's definitely Fall!

So, back to the question...what are you ready to get back to? And, perhaps further to that, is there something you need to let go of to bring that back? 

We are now in yet another phase of getting "back to normal", whatever that may mean to you.  For some, that may mean starting to go back into the office; going to get your groceries rather than getting them delivered;  heading back to the gym vs. online workouts.  Again...whatever pops up for you.

For me?  A couple of things have bubbled up recently.

• Writing, journaling. For some reason I have let this habit slip away. So I started again this morning, just a paragraph or two. What did I need to let go of in order to do that? The idea in my head that it wasn't important enough to spend time on. Basically not true.

• Increasing the intensity of the working out I have been doing. I moved on to a more challenging online workout and, based on how sore I am today, it seems to be working! I had to let go of the idea that going to the gym was the only way to get that kind of workout. Again, not true.

• Getting outside in ALL types of weather. I had started to let the grey, rainy days be my excuse for not getting outside. I had to let go of summer!! This might have been the toughest one.

How about you?

What are you ready to get back to? Is there something you need to let go of in order to start again?

So let's get to it...

Are you willing to try this out?

Your challenge for the next week...

Check in with yourself.

• Ask yourself "what am I ready to get back to"? Allow whatever surfaces to be the "thing". It doesn't have to be a big thing at all. Just trust what comes up.

• Then? Ask yourself...is there something I need to let go of to do this?

• Then do it. One little thing. See what happens.

If you're ready to get intentional about how you're showing up,  Contact me for a chat. It's always good to hear from you!

Stay safe and well.

Warmly,

Ann