"Why me?'
We've all been there. Sh*t hits the fan, and our first response is, "Why is this happening to me"? A completely normal response and a valid question to ask.
And...
If you're working on moving towards resilience, shifting your mindset...this question isn't the most helpful. It puts you in the role of victim...and nobody wants that role.
If you're hoping to move to a more useful state, that particular question "why me" may not be the one that's going to get you there.
From "why me" to "what is this teaching me?". Reframing it to "what is teaching me?" shifts you into a more curious state, a state that has more agency. It puts you in the driver's seat.
This doesn't mean that bad things don't happen.
Resilience is about having bad things happen and staying steady in that storm so that you can move forward more readily.
Having a growth mindset. Moving from "why me" to "what now"?
What's your typical go to response when sh!t hits the fan? The knee jerk reaction that you may not even notice because you do it all of the time. This is fast and sneaky so you have to pay attention, and it's a good indicator of whether you have a growth mindset or not.
Why does having a growth mindset matter? People with a growth mindset tend to embrace challenges as learning opportunities. They also tend to be more resilient and optimistic as well. Coincidence?
What can you do to shift from "why me" to "what's this here to teach me"?
Are you ready?
Let's get to it...
Your challenge...
Let's start with a check in.
Take one moment now to notice....what's your typical 'go to' response when sh!t hits the fan? Be honest with yourself, you're not gonna be telling anyone your answer.
No matter what your answer is, whether you're already pretty good with reframing things...practicing is never a waste of time.
Practicing how to move from "why me" to "what now"?
Step One:
Catch yourself.
Catching yourself saying those words or something like that. "Why me, why is this happening to me"? Catch yourself doing it.
You're going to have to really pay attention because chances are it's a habitual way of thinking for you.
Step Two:
Mentally hit the pause button to stop going down the victim path.
Do this by taking a breath, getting present.
Step Three:
Ask yourself, what's this situation teaching me?
It may be patience, tolerance. or perhaps it's to slow down. Pay attention.
Take some inventory. Remember, there's always a lesson If we're open to hearing it.
We can't always choose what happens to us. Fact. We can always, without exception, learn to manage how we interpret it...how we respond. Also a fact. It's a practice.
Ready to shift your mindset? Contact me
Cheers,
Ann
Why me?