Happy New Year!

Yep! You read that correctly, “Happy New Year”! I don’t know about you, but for me, September always brings a sense of renewal and fresh energy. This probably stems from when it was back to school time and as summer was drawing to a close, a new chapter was beginning. Although I haven’t been “back to school” in quite some time, I still look at September as a time to reflect on what has happened so far in the year and a chance to course correct if that is what needs to occur.

This has special meaning for me this year as September 1st marked one year in my own business and reflecting back on the year that has passed was very useful in deciding how I want to spend my energy for the next four months. It also helped me account for and realize just how much I have accomplished since January of this year. Taking a conscious pause to check in with yourself is something most of us do not routinely do however, it can be really useful. I realized that I have been doing a lot!! September for me this year actually means renewing by slowing down and pausing to reflect and let some of the work I have been doing get integrated. This can’t happen while chasing what’s next all the time. So for September 2016 I will be putting things in “slow motion”, savouring the last few weeks of summer and truly taking time to decide how I want my last few months of 2016 to be.

So what about you? If slowing down isn’t in your plans, just get curious about what is in your plans. Are you satisfied with how things are shaping up or are you ready to shift gears? If a “course correction” is required, what action are you going to take? You still have plenty of time to finish 2016 in a way that is meaningful for you.

So here is my challenge for you, will you take 15 minutes to reflect on how far you have come this year? No kidding, will you? Once you have done that, continue to write the ending that you want to have for 2016. If you keep doing what you’re doing, is the ending likely to happen? If not, take some time to think about what you need to do to finish up how you’d like. You may need to alter your plans to get there but know that you have a choice. Take things off autopilot and step into the driver’s seat – it’s your life!

What label are you wearing?

In the past year or so my acute sense of hearing has become almost overwhelming for me. Stay with me here for a second and I’ll get you on the same page as me, honest. I have become super sensitive to the language people choose to use about a situation, another person or especially, themselves. It is so interesting. Interesting and sometimes absolutely mind boggling.

“I’m stupid; fat, shy, negative, a bad person, a loser…”, the list goes on. I am not making these statements up, these are actual words that people have used to describe themselves to me in conversation. After my initial reaction, usually internal but sometimes quite visceral I start to wonder. Who decided that’s who you are? Who gave you that label and perhaps more importantly, what makes you choose to hang on to it?

When we start out on this planet, we are all perfect. Just ask any new parent. There are no flaws in a newborn. Doesn’t even have to be a human newborn. Think about it, what baby creature is not absolutely perfect and adorable? So what happens? How does that perfect life form end up identifying themselves as “stupid” , “a loser”, or whatever word they use? Sometimes it is due to a fleeting comment made by someone influential or important in their life and it just stuck with them. Sometimes it comes from years and years of being in an environment where this was a common belief that you were sold and bought into.

Sometimes the “labels” are completely harmless, yet a lot of times, there aren’t harmless and have become a deeply rooted belief that someone holds for themself. They are rate limiting in terms of moving forward because if you’re “shy”, how can you meet people or speak publicly? If you’re “stupid” how can you learn something new?

Sometimes, however, these labels can become a convenient excuse for not making change. Even when you are desperate to make it and know that it’s time. The label you choose to wear keeps you firmly stuck in a rut. You wear your label proudly, despite it being a lie. It becomes a rather convenient badge of honour to carry around. Almost like a shield. It protects you from stepping into something different because, well, that’s just who you are…didn’t you read the label?

There is good news, of course. You can remove a label or scribble over it and amend it. You can decide what label you want to wear. Designed by and for you, and guess what? You can have many different ones. Point being, carrying around a label that someone else has given to you is okay if you actually want it and believe it. However, if you realize that it is untrue, rip it off and make your own! You can choose how you want to be. Get curious.

When Visions of Sugarplums Fade

So, here we are on the cusp of a New Year.  The visions of sugarplums dancing in our heads are starting to fade and we are starting to look forward to what’s next.

Well?  What’s next?  This would seem to be the perfect time of year to ask this question as New Year’s resolutions are typically starting to be formed (for those of you who make them) around this time.

What do you want to be different? What do you want more/less of?  Or,  are you feeling stuck and unmotivated? Been there, done that, why even bother?  So much to think about.

I personally do not subscribe to the New Year’s resolution however I had the opportunity to listen to a meditation this morning and it made me think a bit.  It did not prompt me to figure out what I need to “do”.  It was more, what/who do I want to “be”?

For me it was grateful, to continue to be grateful for the simple things in life, the things that really matter.  Specifically my husband and children and the day to day challenges that come up. Grateful for the continuing opportunity to stretch my wings as a coach.  Truly feeling like I am making a difference by partnering with others to find what’s next for them.  I had no idea when I embarked on my journey close to two years ago that I would find so much fulfillment helping others discover theirs.  So, yes, if you want to call it a “resolution” my resolution is to continue to be grateful and look for more opportunities in my day to savour what is, right here, right now.

Wishing you all the very best as we embark on another fresh year.  A blank page to begin again, if that is what you need or another blank page to continue to build on what you have already created in this previous year.  Whatever it is, know that you have choices to make this year whatever you want it to be…you really do.

When Is It the “right” time?

Image Source: http://www.turismo.intoscana.it

As I continue on my journey as a coach, accountability partner, motivator, mindset changer…I am starting to notice some old patterns in myself re-surfacing.  Primarily, the crippling theme of “perfection” is starting to rear its ugly head.  I’ll do this when…you fill in the blank – I have my final designation, I have this many $$, the kids are grown up, the mortgage is paid, after this one project is done, when I’m not travelling as much etc… you get the picture.

All the input I provide to my clients does not seem to apply to me!  Funny isn’t it?  For some reason,we can share our wisdom, provide our guidance and gently push our clients in the direction they want to go yet, when it comes to ourselves we seem to be exempt.  We tell them not to worry about everything being 100% in place, just go play, be curious and have fun.  Make mistakes and learn.  Be awkward!

I remind myself that Michelangelo did not create his beloved David overnight.  He chipped away lovingly at it until David revealed himself.  Through tiny shifts and maybe the odd occasional chunk of marble falling off, the beauty, strength and potential within was revealed.  It was a labour of true love. If we wait until we are perfectly ready, then nothing will happen.

You can think about what you want, talk about what you want, dream about what you want but until you take action, it is just a thought.

My “David” is far from ready however, being a work in progress is pretty cool too.  It’s time to take action!

Is it time to hit the “reset” button?

So, it has been one month, 30 days, 1/12th of a year – however you want to put it. It has been a month of doing nothing. What? Okay, let’s re-frame that, it has been a month of receiving rather than a month of chasing. A month of saying I’m not putting anything out there and I am going to just “be”. A month of self-reflection and, gulp, meditation, daily meditation. Something completely foreign and new to me.

So why am I telling you this and what could this possibly have to do with you?

Hmmm- I want to share with you what is possible when instead of looking for “what’s next” you sit with “what is”. Oooh, I cannot tell you how difficult this was for me… initially.

“Doing” is kind of, well, what I “do” and I know I’m not alone here. We, yep, I’m dragging you into this now, We equate “doing” with accomplishment, success, justifying our existence. How many tick boxes can we check today? When someone asks the question “how’s it going?” if you don’t answer the question with an “ugh..I’m so busy”, then you’re just not doing enough. Sound familiar?

I decided I needed to let the world catch up with me. Here’s what happened. Emails started coming to my mailbox from people I had not heard from for months, people that are now “ready” to work with me. Dinner invitations to “catch up” surfaced. Phone calls to “chat” were in my voicemail. I secured several new clients and an opportunity that knocked my socks off. All while doing NOTHING.

Now before you start saying…”easy for you to do, you work for yourself”. Think about it, I am an entrepreneur, my work means I have to be “out there”, constantly building my business. I am not suggesting that you take a month and ignore your work. What if you took the weekend? What if you took a couple of evenings? What could that open up for you? My point being, that if we are too busy continually chasing what’s next, we do not give the world a chance to catch up with us. Maybe not the “world”, perhaps your spouse, children, family, friends. You send out a message that you are available to receive some good stuff.

I don’t know about you, but I like receiving good stuff. So what will this change for me moving forward? I am consciously deciding that every couple of months, I am going to take a week to integrate, slow down and hit “reset”. What will you do?