It's rainy, grey and messy. Oops, and there’s a new pothole that wasn’t there yesterday. Did I mention it was rainy? And then, it happens. The sun starts to shimmer through the trees (which now have buds on them), the rain seems to have subsided and what’s that poking through the soil…a crocus? Then, the ultimate sign…a robin! It is spring. The change of seasons. What do road closures, potholes and rain (sometimes lots of rain), all have in common? They are all "signs". They indicate mess, inconvenience and cause some discomfort. Yet, they all lead to something wonderful and new. Spring!!
Where am I going with this?
You know me well enough by now to realize that, yep, I write about what is around me. What I am hearing, the conversations I am having and maybe, sometimes, the things I have experienced myself.
When I speak with people it is often very clear to me that they are poised and ready to make a change yet, they are overcome with fear and can’t seem to take the step (yes, just one) that could propel them forward to the “what’s next?” for them.
The thing about "change" is, it is inevitable. Even if you do nothing, the world around you is going to keep changing, babies being born, people dying, losing jobs, relationships ending etc. Change really is the only constant, just like the seasons coming and going.
What are the signs that you are ready for a change?
Sometimes, the signs can be subtle, boredom, unhappiness and maybe less enthusiasm for the things that used to light you up and challenge you. Or, it can be a deep yearning for something else that you want but feel like you can't have. Yet, staying in the "situation" whether it is a career, relationship or believing that you can't have that thing that you yearn for, is often what people do even when the time has come for something new.
Why? The answer is no surprise - FEAR. Despite how uncomfortable you are in your current situation, it is yours. You know it and understand it and it feels much safer than taking a step into the "unknown" to pursue something else that you can't see yet. Seems a little silly when you see it in black and white now doesn't it? Holding yourself back because of fear. Of what? Ask yourself, just exactly what are you afraid of? New opportunities? A new career? Pursuing the thing that you are yearning for?
Just like the lead up to spring, making changes can be messy, inconvenient and uncomfortable and...after? That's when the sun starts to come out again more consistently and all the new growth appears. I'm not talking radical "out of your box" change but, rather, going to the edges of it, trying things on for size, playing with possibilities. Asking "what if"?
Easier and safer. Is that how you want to live your life? If so, don't bother reading any further. If not, what is one thing that you can do today to explore what else is out there for you? One. Tiny. Step. I am guessing that until you do something, those "signs" will keep popping up except...without the beautiful spring afterwards. I have heard that what we resist will persist.
We are wired for safety, despite the fact that our brains have evolved to where they are today, the number one job of our brain is to keep us safe. Back in the day, when saber tooth tigers were actually around, keeping safe was, well, a matter of life or death. Now, there pretty much isn’t much that is out to eat us for breakfast, yet, our brain is still stuck in the past. Fight or flight. Useful in some situations and, for the most part, not very useful at all.
When we get the “signs” that it is time for a change, that is when our primitive brain starts banging the drums and clanging the cymbals…danger danger!!
Here’s the thing - your primitive brain is a LIAR. Sure, it has great intentions, the whole safety thing, however, the warning level for this alarm system to go off is set at a very low level. Just the thought of changing up what we do sets the bells a blaring.
So what is a person to do? Take. Action. I know this sounds way too simple and yet, it is so true. When you feel the fear of doing something different or new, take a step. Just one. That will quell the fear monster. Fear doesn’t like action. Action trumps fear.
If you are feeling the signs that it is time for a change and you don't know where to start, Contact me and we'll figure it out, together.